Motherhood is equal parts beautiful and overwhelming. If you have been feeling touched out or not yourself lately, you are not alone. I do a lot of reflecting and thinking on my role as a mother, always wondering if I did or said the right thing in trying moments (especially if my patience is thin and cup is empty). It can feel isolating and heavy to be alone in your thoughts.
Over the years, I have learned to let go of certain things to make motherhood easier and found simple rhythms and habits that have helped me to become a happier and more present mother. Not perfect – no one is – just more grounded and at ease with the daily routine of it all.
If you want to work on this part of yourself, I’m right here with you. Here are 30 simple habits that make motherhood easier and have helped me become a happier mom.
✨For my SAHM friends: 14 Ways to Slow Down & Romanticize Life as a SAHM
30 Habits to Be a Happier Mom
Letting Go of Perfection.
Let go of perfection. I do not have the perfect house, the perfect kitchen, the perfect temper, the perfect patience, the perfect body, the perfect cleaning routine… I could go on and on. But I have let. that. go. Perfectly imperfect in all areas. I cannot (and will not) do it all because I am the mother of two young children and this season of life is not going to last forever. A clean house will have to wait and the patience may never come. But I do the best I can and that is enough.
Embrace messes. I do not worry about my kids making a mess during the day. There are art supplies all over the dining room table and blocks and legos and half-finished puzzles and water on the floor from their tea party and crayon peels under my feet but it really does not bother me. I am so happy to watch them play and explore and create all day long. Their mess is a sign of a productive day of play. That’s all that matters. And before we head upstairs for bedtime routine, we clean up together and that is that.
Instill Simple Daily Rhythms
Put the breakfast routine is on autopilot. I always know I will be eating oats in some form and my kids will be having oats like me, leftover pancakes from the weekend, cereal, or toast with a side of fruit. Sometimes tofu scramble if I get fancy, but other than that… we stick to the usuals and it takes me less than 10 min to serve breakfast.
Make easy meals. I do my best to keep lunches and dinners just as simple. For lunches, it is usually leftovers, soup/stew I make for the week, pasta and jarred sauce, or sandwiches. Dinners are made in under 30 minutes and I keep a long list of our favorites on my phone so I never wonder “what should I make?”
Plan dinners ahead of time. Writing out dinners for the week ahead of time keeps me on track and takes the guessing work out of my day.
Follow a daily rhythm. It is relaxed but it is a rhythm that we all thrive on.
Make Time for Yourself as a Mom
Get up early & have morning “me” time. I like to get up before everyone else when I am able to enjoy a quiet house before the chaos. Once the kids are up, my husband spends the morning with them before he heads to work and I have time to read, blog, check emails, or do whatever the heck I want before my day begins. It is glorious.
Read for pleasure AND growth. I read for at least an hour a day nearly every day. I do this in the morning before my kids get up, during quiet time, and before bed. Sometimes I can even sneak in a few pages if my kids are playing independently. Fiction for pleasure and non-fiction for growth and education. Reading makes me so incredibly happy.
Take quiet time for yourself vs. cleaning or cooking. Fiona still takes a long afternoon nap and Willow will play quietly, watch a movie/show of her choice, or have screentime on the iPad. I let her pick. Sometimes we go outside and she explores the backyard. But whatever the situation, I take the next 90 minutes to 2 hours reading, writing, listening to a podcast or just relaxing. I do not clean during this time. I do not try to prep dinner. I do something that makes me happy and fills my cup. I need this every single day.
Make one fancy drink a day. Whether that is a mocha latte, iced coffee, or iced tea… there is something special about my afternoon pick-me-up.
Create Joyful Moments with Your Kids
Read to your children. Unless I am in the middle of cooking or doing something I cannot step away from, I will always read when my child holds a book out to me. We cuddle right up wherever we may be. It is one of my greatest joys as a mama. This might seem like the opposite of what you want as a mother and that is fine, too!! Replace this with the thing you do love doing with them.
Play on the floor with your kids sometimes. Blocks, legos, magnatiles, animal figurines, dress-up/role play, house, hide-and-seek, doll house… whatever it is, I get immersed in their world at least a few times a week. My girls are always asking me to play with them and I do my best to commit phone-free at least once. It fills their cup and honestly, mine. It makes me want to cry when I think of the day they stop asking.
Go outside everyday, if you can. I put the to-do list to the side as often as I can and we head out. In the spring/summer/fall, we are out almost everyday (even if that means 10-20 minutes). In the winter, we do our best to get out when we can. It is good for EVERYONE.
Keep art supplies within reach for the kids to create at any moment. Currently that means crayons, colored pencils, paper, coloring books, and stickers. Having these things out means I am not always setting everyone up when they want to create. They will go in there whenever they want and sit at the dining room table. It’s a win for everyone.
Color together. Crayons or watercolor or whatever it is… I love to sit down and color with them. It feels nice to be a kid again and it makes them so happy.
Have dance parties. I have a Spotify playlist that I continually add to when we have new favorites. Dancing is the cure to any bad mood. If someone is grumpy, it means it is time for a song or two.
Eat meals outside. This is especially true during the spring/summer. We love eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner outside… sometimes all 3 in one day. We either sit on our deck, at our outdoor table, or on a blanket. It means no mess for me to clean in the kitchen – WIN!
Have seasonal traditions. Popsicle dates in the summer, apple picking in the fall, pumpkin carving in October, Advent and cookies in December… and that is just one example for each season. We have loads of traditions and it makes the changing of seasons so magical. I welcome the shift with open arms.
Build a Community for Yourself
Aim for weekly play dates. Having a play date or two each week keeps us looking forward to adventures with friends.
Find mom friends. And speaking of play dates, that means I get to spend time with my friends and that makes a heck of a difference in my week. I am so grateful for all my mom friends!
FaceTime family. A lot of my family live out of state so FaceTime dates are a must and I look forward to them every day.
Keep Your Home Calm (as much as you can!)
Do only one major cleaning a week. Aside from picking things up at the end of the day and wiping down the kitchen after meals and before bed, I don’t do much else during the week. Sometimes I vacuum if things are worse than usual or spray down the mirrors if I notice all the hand smudges but other than that, I spend a few hours on the weekend doing the bathrooms and floors and anything else that may need cleaning while my husband is home. This may change when my kids get older but for now, it is what it is.
Rotate your kids’ toys. It is an extra step for me but it is not problem because it means my kids will play HARD when the “new” toys come in. I currently do this every two weeks or so. I talk at length about this HERE.
Have open ended toys. I can be a little selective when it comes to toys we bring into our home and that’s because I know that open-ended toys mean longer playtime, more creativity, and quite frankly, they are not annoying/loud/obnoxious. I truly believe my kids are as imaginative and intelligent and resourceful as they are because of the way they play with their toys. Here are some of our favorites. You can also shop HERE.
Declutter often. I keep up with de-cluttering when things do not serve us any longer to keep things from piling up or getting out of hand. Whether it is toys or clothing or whatever… it is a weight lifted every single time.
Small Joyful Habits for Yourself
Use Target drive-up. Oh, I am including it because IT MAKES MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER. IYKYK <3
Listen to podcasts while cleaning the kitchen. My husband spends time with the kids after dinner and I get to listen to a podcast or music while I clean the kitchen and it feels like a luxury.
I lower my expectations. It’s never good to go into the day thinking you will get everything on your list done. Your to-do list is a guideline… that’s the truth of it. Tomorrow is a new day.
End the day with something delicious. Almost every night I have a little something while I am reading or watching television and I just look forward to this time to eat in peace. My go-to bedtime snacks are: air-popped popcorn with lots of nutritional yeast (fave), a square or two of dark chocolate and tea, banana nice cream, or fruit.
Watch the sunset at night. I have a front-row view out of my kitchen sliders, which is awesome during the winter (and man, winter sunsets are magnificent). When the weather is nice, I sit out on the deck for a few minutes and watch, sometimes with my husband or sometimes just me. And sometimes I let Willow stay up and watch and she just loves that. And she knows that mommy loves her sunsets. <3 It is the perfect end to my day.
✨You may also enjoy:
- 10 Tips for Slow Living with Kids
- 10 Simple Ways to Create a Calmer Home
- 60 Ways to Romanticize Your Life
- The Benefits of Seasonal Living (Why It Brings More Joy)
